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Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Life...


Lately...
 
We said goodbye to this lady. (Saddest day ever for me, BEST day ever for her!) She didn't shed one tear she was just SO excited!
 
Arland

You are getting so big! I cant believe how fast you are changing and the things you can do and say now. You are seriously such a happy guy! You love everyone, especially baby Porter. I love that you like to help mommy around the house. You give Porter his binky or a blanky and you just love to help. You are loving planes right now and you love to play with Paze. You are SUCH a picky eater! I never thought I would have a picky eater because I was never that way but you are seriously so picky, which doesn't help your "weight" issue. I guess you have your daddy's genes. I love you buddy you brighten my day and make me laugh All The TIME! Love, Momma


 Porter,
My love bug you are my little miracle everyday. I love this stage of your life right now. You smile CONSTANTLY! You are always happy and just glad to be apart of the crowd. I think that you are teething right now because you could chew off my finger and your binky. Today mommy was reminded of everything that we went through together. Not that I don't think about it all the time. Today I was at Timpanogos Hospital doing some work and I pulled into the parking lot where they put mommy on the helicopter to go up to the U of U. I parked right in front and stared at it for a second. Its the first time I have been there since that day. I remember being put on that helicopter and the flight nurse that was talking to me, trying to keep me calm. I remember hearing her talk to the pilot, I kept my eyes closed because I was so scared, but I could hear everything. I remember thinking about you and praying that you Porter Boy would stay with me and that Heavenly Father wouldn't leave us. I remember talking to you in my head as they loaded me onto the helicopter. I had all of those feelings rush back to me, and I started shaking. It was such a magnificently spiritual experience that I cherish every day. I remember those people that day, their voices. I remember you, I loved you so much already. Thank you for sharing that with me Porter. Thank you for choosing me to do that for you. Love, Mommy 





Wednesday, October 23, 2013

My Boys

 
 
 
Arland


As I sit here typing I can hear your little cry as you lay in your bed in “time out.” You are such a sweet little boy but you sure do know how to make a woman crazy! You are just so tired and I know that you have watched WAY to much tv today! So it is now noon and I am ready for you to go down for a nap before I make you play outside the rest of the day with Pazely and on the swing set. You are so funny right now Arland because I put your nose in the corner first and you turned around and looked at me as if to say “watch I am NOT going to put my nose in the corner” then you turn around and dump everything out of the diaper bag. I grabbed your hand and made you pick up every little thing and put it back. Then you fell to the floor and screamed. Why I have never documented one of your temper tantrums I DO NOT KNOW! Even though you have these tantrums every now and then I love when we become friends again. You always come up to me with tears in your eyes after you have come back to reality and say “sorry mamma” and then I get the best hugs and kisses after that. After everything is done we forgive and forget. I always hope as your momma that you learned something but lets be honest your two year old brain forgives and forgets as fast as a bolt as lightening. I love that about you.
You are doing so good at potty training! Nights are a little rough but you are a champ! You came to the store the other day with momma and you had your eyes set on a thing of airplane toys. I told you we couldn’t get them and you had a meltdown. You talked about the airplane the rest of the week and one day daddy came home and you asked him if you could go get the “pane?” He said that you had done such a good job going potty that he would buy you the “panes.” We went to the store late at night and daddy let you choose which plane you wanted. You knew exactly which one you wanted and you carried it through the entire store. You were so happy to get your new “pane” and you told everyone about your new toy. Little moments like that are what we love most with you. I love to see the excitement on your little face. That is a memory I will have forever.
Thanks for being my little buddy Arland. I truly love you more than you could ever know. Love momma

Porter

Your smile is the best way to start my day. I wake up everymorning to the sound of your little voice making sweet chattering noises. I look over the crib to pick you up and you give me the biggest smile. I have never met a happier baby. You are ALWAYS happy and excited to have anyone hold you or play with you. You started rolling over last month and you love to sit in your bumbo chair! I cant believe how big you are getting! You love your toys, for your 6 month mark Arland and mommy went to the store and got you a little present. Arland picked it out and he loves to help you play with it.
You love your brother Arland, you love to laugh at him. I cant tell if you are teathing, but you LOVE to put your hands in your mouth...all at once. Which means we get a lot of gagging and throwing up because you just want your whole fist in your mouth. You love walks and being outside, so does Arland. The walks put you right to sleep. I love everything about you right now Porter, I love the way that you smile right into my soul, I love the way you sleep and make little noises while you are sleeping. I love the way you love your daddy. I love seeing you and Arland and your daddy all snuggled into mom and dads bed reading books and watching movies. You are my little and I will always love you. Love mommy.








Thursday, October 3, 2013

My Kiddos

Kiddos Update
 
Arland,
 
Wow my little man is growing up way to fast! I cant believe how he is changing everyday. Arland you have turned into my little buddy you love to help me take care of your brother and do little things for mamma. You LOVE to throw your brothers diaper away and bring me blankets and burp rags for him. You love your new big boy room and your big boy bed that your daddy built! You love to play in the back yard with Pazely (or should I say torture) and your swing set. You love to tell Paze to go down the "wee" (slide) and you laugh so hard at her every time. You LOVE going to nursery! Seriously that is an understatement! You cry when we have to take you back home and ask momma the whole week when you get to go to nursery again. You call me momma now, not mom, not mommy, you call me momma and I LOVE it! You love to sit infront of our window and wait for daddy to come home. You are talking so much right now, your vocabulary has grown immensely! You now put sentences together and you love to run around the house calling for your auntie Emm who lives with us right now. You love trains...more than any other boy I know. You made a choo choo track out of my ice cube trays. You will make anything into a choo choo ack. (not track, ack).
You are such a loving boy Arland you love to help momma and you are friends with everyone. You are rarely in a bad mood. Thanks so much for choosing me as your momma, I am so thankful everyday that I can call you mine!
Love, momma
 
 
 
Porter,
You are my angel baby. I seriously think with everything you went through that you came out of it with the happiest disposition. You love this life that you were given and you let everyone around you feel the happiness that you have. You smile at every person you meet and it is almost as if you see the deepest part of their spirit. I had you in the tub the other day and you looked at the door and smiled. I was sitting on the floor watching your little face smile at the door. You looked away and looked back at the same spot on the door and smiled and laughed. I tried to look into your eyes to catch a glimpse of who you might be looking at. I asked if it was your grandpas, aunts, uncles, or our sweet friend Shelby. All I know is that you couldn't stop smiling at who ever it was.
You are now rolling over! This is a huge accomplishment! When your brother was born I was so worried about him making every milestone at the right age and with you being 3 months younger than what you really are I lose track of when you are "suppose" to do things. I now just enjoy what you do when you do it. I am in no rush to have you "beat statistics" you are going to do things when you want. And to my surprise, you are doing everything you are suppose to be doing (says your doctor and home nurse). I am so proud of you and the strength that your little spirit has, you defy ALL odds and love life. Thank you for being my little and making me smile every day.
Love, your momma

 
Arland and cousin Flynnster
 
We LOVE when flynnster comes to visit us!
 
My Porter Babe

Monday, August 19, 2013

Kids Update

Update on my kiddos!

Arland:

At 2 and half we are now potty training! It has gone GREAT he is a champ! I decided that I am SOOOO sick of poo diapers. Seriously it is the worst thing to change a 2 year olds diaper. So we went and bought a potty and pull ups and toy story underwear and BAM the kid loves sitting on the potty and after two days he doesn't pee in his undies any more! Number 2 is another story and is still a work in progress.
He LOVES trains! Seriously I have never met a kid that loves trains more than Arland. Heath and I took him on the Heber Creeper last week and boy was he happy. He cried at first and we were trying to figure out why he was crying while we were getting on the train and he kept saying "OH NO Choo Choo!' we found out that he was thinking about Toy Story 3 where the Choo Choo goes off the cliff. haha well he got over that really fast. Soon he forgot how scary it was and he was so happy to just be on the train. He has a little wooden train that he plays all over the house with and I know I will have to invest in another for Porter.
Arland is Loving out new house. He loves to play downstairs in his play room and he loves being outside with out cute neighbors. We are loving who Arland is turning into, he brightens our little family every day with his little personality.

Porter:

Porter is now 4 months! WOW where has the time gone?! Seriously I remember when this little Peanut was just 16 inches long and 3 lbs! Now he is 9 lbs and who knows how long he is! He is at such a fun stage right now where he is cooing at everything and loves to smile! He really has the brightest personality and is such a patient baby. He loves to just be around people, and he is so calm. I have a nurse that comes to my house every month to chart Porters growth and development and she said that he is doing extremely well for how little he was when he was born. She said that he is in the 25% for his weight gestationaly and that is WONDERFUL! He loves his binky and his swing and he is getting really good at tummy time and lifting his head. He sleeps through the night waking up around 6 am and going to bed at midnight! We are loving this schedule! He truly is such an angel and shows us little glimpses of his spirit every day. We love you Porter boy.

Porters Blessing

 
We were able to have our sweet baby blessed yesterday and it was such a perfect day. Because of how premature he was I am SUPER paranoid about sickness and people around him so we chose to have him blessed at our house. I loved having it at the house because it became so much more personal with our close family. We decided to have just our immediate family come (not because we don't love all of our family and friends) but because I just cant have that many people around my little Porter and I am very protective and proactive about people getting their DTAP vaccine. We are SOOO thankful to our family for being supportive of our decision to protect our baby after everything he has been through.
Heath did a wonderful job, and the blessing was so beautiful and perfect for our little miracle baby.
 
 


 
Grandpa P Grandma P and Great Grandma P
 
Grandpa and Grandma Pulham
 

 
Grandpa Neubert
 
Grandpa Neubert and Grandma Neubert
 
Great Grandma Neubert
 
Great Grandma Jepsen
 
Hannah's Family
 
Mom Dad Arland and Porter

 Daddy and Porter
 
Pulham Family
 

Monday, May 6, 2013

Porter Boy

Cutie Patootie

That is what the nurses in the NICU call Porter. One day we came to the hospital to see him for the day and one of the nurses called him that. It has stuck. This little cute has been a miracle from the day we found out that we were pregnant. He amazes me everyday at the progress he is making in the NICU, as parents Heath and I worry all the time. I worry every second of the day about this little boy of mine, but he reassures me every day that he is here for a reason and he wants to be here so he fights for it. I am so blessed to have such a strong little spirit in my life and that he chose us to be his parents. 

After Porter was born they hooked him up to a ventilator. He was having a hard time breathing even though he came out kicking and screaming, he still needed help his lungs were not developed. This was all to be expected. He was on the ventilator for 2 days and then was taken off and put on a lower dose of oxygen with humidity. All the nurses were so impressed with how well he was doing! It was a couple days after that (around day 4) that he had his first bowel movement! Who knew that you could be so excited about that, but we were ecstatic! That meant that he was processing everything through his intestines and his kidneys were functioning properly. He also started taking in around 3-4 ml. of milk through his feeding tube (a low dose as to not startle his stomach). In the NICU there are 9 rooms. The first room is connected to the room where I delivered Porter by a window. He stayed in room 1 for a week exactly. Porter was given a nurse to care for him one on one 24 hours a day. There is one nurse assigned for one baby. Porter was then moved to room 2 after the first week and it was one nurse for two babies. This is when I was able to hold Porter for the first time! He was finally stable enough that I was able to do skin to skin and have him hear my heart beat. It was wonderful! I will always remember the first time that I was able to hold him, he was so small and fragile but as I held him I couldnt help but think about how amazing he was, I told him about Arland and his daddy I whispered to him about how much we loved him and how proud we were of him. I sang to him softly so that he could remember my voice from being inside of me. I was so special. 
Porter was moved from room two to room three the next day! They say that the big babies go to room three through nine! My baby is anything but big, he is doing so well on his oxygen that they decided that he could handle being in room three! I was so surprised when I got to the hospital that day! They have a board that parents can look at to see where their babies are and who their primary nurses are. So when I saw that they moved him I was so proud!
He is still in room three and will be there for a VERY long time hopefully. He has one nurse to three babies and is doing extremely well. He is still on oxygen and they moved his feeding tube from his mouth to his nose because it was starting to irritate his mouth. His oxygen has continued to come down every day. We breathe oxygen at a 21 and he is usually at a 21! They keep the cannula in his nose to help him remember to breathe, and sometimes he has to have his oxygen level increased up to a 23-24 but for the most part he is doing really well on the lower oxygen levels! He is also now learning how to control his own body temperature, and they are thinking about putting him in a onesie soon. Porter now weighs 3 lbs 15 oz. Once he hits 1800 grams they will be able to move him from his isolet to a crib which is a HUGE deal. He is so close to this goal now. They are also fortefying his milk. Like I said, when he was first born he was taking around 3-4 ml. now he is taking 31. The milk I give him has 22 calories in it and they add an extra 24 cals to it. We are hoping this little boy puts on some weight! 
I go to see Porter every day. Yes it is hard, but he is my baby, Porter is just as much my baby as Arland is and I would do anything for both my boys. They mean the world to me, and that is why I go to the hospital every day. Porter amazes me by his strength every time I see him. The other day I was holding him and he started to breathe really heavy, I couldnt tell why he was breathing the way he was so I asked the nurse what was going on. She said that he was retracting and that I needed to put him back in the isolet. She then took a hose and sucked out his nose. She got the biggest booger out of his nose! The poor boy couldnt breathe because of it! Because I go every day to the hospital I am able to learn about him and the different "cues" that he gives off to the nurses. Learning all of these things really will help me when I get to bring him home, just like when I noticed that he was having a harder time breathing. I love going up there and holding Porter, I love to watch his little face when he is sleeping and I love to see his little eyes open and look around. I love his little cry and the little facial expressions that he makes. I love to tell him about his brother, I love to tell his about Arland and all the fun things they are going to do together, I love telling Porter about his daddy and how much his daddy loves him. He is making so much progress and we continue to see little miracles in Porter every day, he is our little ray of sunshine and we are so blessed to have him here with us today. 

Sunday, April 28, 2013

Birth Story of:

 
 
I have since realized that after being released from the hospital that I have absolutley no time to do anything any more. I have gone from a sluggish physically and emotionally exhausted person to a crazy person trying to do everything and be everywhere all at once. That is what happends when you have a two year old at home who hasnt lived with you for the past two months and a little baby in the NICU.
The day that Porter was born is a day that will forever be engraved in my memmory. It started mostly on Sunday, I had started to feel incredibly tired and so emotional (not that pregnant ladies are already emotional this was a million times worse!) I thought of it as just being tired of being at the hospital. I told Heath that I was just so tired of everything. I was tired of being in that hospital room with one window that I rarely got to look out of because I had to stay in bed, I was SO tired of the food. I was getting mean to some of the nurses, I was just TIRED! I couldnt tell if the ache in my back was just from sitting in bed for so long, I could barely get the strength in my legs to stand in the shower any more and every time I stood up my hip would lock out of place. I literally felt like I was falling apart. My inlaws came over that Sunday, and I was just miserable. My sister in law told me that I looked like I wasnt feeling well and boy was she right! That night I cried to Heath about how I didnt know if I could be in that room much longer, I knew that I had to but the thought was unbarable. I eventually fell asleep and that next morning at 5am I woke up in labor. I started bleeding and the doctors were afrain that I could start hemoraging so they rushed Heath and I to Labor and Delivery. The previous post "Tired" explains what happend there. They hooked me up to an IV and started giving me steroids and magnesium to ease my labor. I went from having contractions every minute to every 15 minutes. The steroids were given to help the baby with his lungs at birth and the magnesium was for the babies brain to prevent brain bleads. I absolutley HATE that magnesium. The drug makes to feel like you are swimming through mud, HOT mud. I was so groggy and dilirious, feeling like I was a thousand degrees. I remember being wheeled into that room and not feeling the panic that I felt the first time we were in that room. The first time they wheeled us into the room with the window to the NICU I felt scared, helpless, unsure because we didnt know if our little 23 week baby would choose to come that night. This felt different, Heath and I talked about how calm we felt (scared but calm) we knew that if he came tonight he would be strong, he would be comforted and he would be able to fight for this life alot harder then his little body would have at 23 weeks. 
Heath called our families telling them that we had been taken to Labor and Delivery, they came as soon as possible staying with us in that little room until things stabalized with my contractions. They monitored me for infection signs are (fever, nausea, tender stomache, bleeding, blood test showing high blood count).
Eventually our families left and they wheeled Heath and I to our room where we would hopefully be able to keep this baby in a little bit longer.
 
On Wednesday I woke up with the worst indigestion that I have ever had (I had not had this problem my whole pregnancy). I was really dehydrated and every time I drake water I felt like it was stuck right at my throught and wouldnt go down. My nurse pumped me with every anti nausea indigestion medication you can think of. It would not stop. I had a horrible pain in my back again and anyway that I laid in my bed I could not get comfortable. My good friend Shelby came to visit me and my mom that day and she brought me my favorite pregnancy food, a cheap crunchy taco from taco bell. haha weird cravings! I was still so sick though. I kept telling them that I was feeling really strange that day, I was so thirsty but couldnt drink anything and I was so uncomfortable. My doctor then came in and listned to the babies heart beat. It was unusually high 160-170. His base line is usually 140, she then told me that she wanted to feel my stomache and I flinched right as she touched me. My body was hurting. My nurse took out my IV and had two nurses from life flight replace it. (I am a hard stick) They usually are some of the best people to put an IV because they can do it in the most random places in the air. They got it in on the 4th try and went on their way. I asked my nurse before if she could just wait to put an IV in because I hated them so bad. She told me that she had a feeling that I needed a fresh IV in for that day. They did some blood work after that and then Dr. Weber came to my room. She is my high risk OB and told me that she wanted me to go back to labor and deliver for some monitoring. My grandma and aunts had come to visit at this point and were able to see me for a small period of time. Shelby walked with me down to Labor and Delivery and called Heath to tell him what was going on. My mom picked up all of my personal belongings and came down later. They hooked up my IV and started me on fluids. I thought my contractions were around 15 minutes apart, it seems as though I was wrong though, they were 3 minutes apart, I just couldnt tell because they were leaving a constant pain in my back. My back hurt the worst. My team of doctors came in to talk to me about what was going on. Shelby called Heath and put him on speaker phone. They told me that I was in labor and they couldnt do anything to stop it because I had a  infection called corio, coria (not sure how to spell it). They babies heart rate was up and they needed the baby to come that day. Dr. Kamyar (she is my main high risk OB and I LOVED her!) told me that at 29 weeks and 5 days Porter would be born. He would have a high risk of undeveloped lungs and because of my low fluid he may have problems moving around his little arms and legs because he was inside of such a tight space for such a long time. But with all of the things that could be wrong we felt that he had a higher chance of things going right if we could get him out of my body which had an infection at this point. I started to fever and then Dr. Kamyar sent in the anesthesiologist to give me my epidural. It was WONDERFUL! I was finally able to relax for a while and let my body prepare to have this baby.
Our families arrived at the hospital and we were able to relax much more this time then two months earlier. There was a peace in the room that I will never forget. I know for a fact that Porter was supposed to come at that time because of the peace and comfort we felt in that room that day. We were definitley being watched over and comforted that day. After two hours on the Pitocen I was dialted to a 3! We had made great progress, 5 hours passed though and Dr. Kamyar came into tell me that I was still at a 3. She told me that she wanted to do a c-section. My heart rate was too high and the babies heart rate was dropping too low. She told me that we needed to get him out and I had NO problem with that. They wheeled me into the surgical room and prepped me for surgery. I drank this anti nausia medicine that made me feel like I had just drank 40 gallons of grape juice, it was aweful! I was shaking really bad as they strapped my arms to the table. The anisthesiologist told me that they didnt have time to do a spinal block so they upped my epidural and told me to call them "numb and number!" haha he then poked my arm and asked me if I could feel it, I couldnt feel a thing! Heath came in the room and sat behind the curtain at my head. Dr. Kamyar told me that because my skin was still tight she would have to do some acrobatics to get Porter out. She did too! Heath peaked over the curtain with camera ready. We wanted to get a picture of the baby before they passed him through the window. As I sat and waited for what seemed like the longest 4 minutes of my life I waited to hear somthing. I waited to hear my baby. Dr. Kamyar told me that she could see the baby. It was then that I heard it. I heard him cry, I heard a cry that told me that my baby had a strong set of lungs. The cry meant that he was strong, alot stronger then people thought he would be. Heath took pictures as they passed him through the window to the NICU. His little arms and legs were kicking all over as if to say thank you for getting me out of that tight place. Heath followed the nurse into the NICU to see our baby. I laid on the surgical bed to to stitched up. Dr. Kamyar was able to get our precious little baby out in 4 minutes with a total time of 20 minutes when they wheeled me out. She was amazing!
I was then wheeled to my room where my family was, they all looked through the window at the baby hoping to get a glance of the "hair" that everyone was talking about. Boy did he have a head of hair! He truly is our miracle baby! Porter David Pulham was born on April 18th 2013 at 12:18 am. He was 3lbs 9oz and 16 3/4 in. long. He was perfect! We are already so in love with this little baby. We are truly blessed and have witnessed miracles. It is amazing how a little person can take up so much room in your heart.
  
 
 



 
Love, Heath Hannah Arland and baby Porter