Tuesday, March 25, 2014


Porter boy,
You are my joy! You started crawling this month and wow I can't keep up with you! You are loving the freedom of getting everywhere you want! 
You love walks at the park and following your brother around. You love Arlands toys and teasing him with them. You love food! That is an understatement. You can't get enough! You love sitting in your high chair at the island with arland and just hanging out. 
You love tub time and playing with toys and splashing! 
I love you mister porter! I can't believe next month you will be 1! Stop now! Love mommy! 


My Arland, 
This past week aunt Chelsee invited us to go to thanksgiving point farm or as you call it the "chicken farm." You were more fascinated with the chickens then the horses, cows or goats! Funny kid. We got to go on a pony ride and you named the horse bullseye and you were telling him to giddy up the entire time! Haha 
We also went on a carriage ride! 
It was so fun to see you and Porter sitting next to each other. Porter just loves you so much! You are such a good big brother! You are always making sure that he is taken care, "mom Porta hungy!" And "NO PORTA! You no do dat!" 
You have been taking gymnastics the past couple months and you can't wait to go "jumping" every week! A couple of weeks ago you went to gymnastics with Grammy and you started hitting your teacher. You were screaming and crying and so Grammy dragged you home that same way. Mom had to take you back to apologize to your teacher but she wasn't there so all week we talked about how we don't hit people and how it makes people sad. That day at gymnastics came and you wanted to color a picture for your teacher, she said thank you and told you how important it is to listen to teacher. You have been GREAT ever since then! Of course we have a pep talk before class every time but you are doing great now! 
Arland you are still loving trains and you love to go on walks with your toy lawn mower. I love to listen to you play with your toys, that wild imagination of yours! Thanks for being my buddy! Love mommy

Tuesday, March 4, 2014

March 2

This month marks a very important day in my life. It is a day that changed what I had "planned" forever. One year ago Heath and I had found out that we were going to be expecting a new little addition to our family. Arland was going to have a brother! We couldn't be more happy. We had been "planning" our future. Our little family would be growing and soon we would outgrow our little red brick house. We put our house up for sale and had big  plans to move back to our small town we grew up in. We found our dream house and we were determined to have it! We had a buyer for our house and everything was falling into place. Heath was in school and was debating on whether he wanted to take a semester off to work on the "new house." We both felt like our life was so exciting! But in the back of both our minds something felt different. I started showing signs of my little babe having problems. At 18 weeks I went to the hospital for bleeding. Dangerously low amniotic fluid followed that with "signs" of my water breaking. On march 2, 2013 I woke up feeling extremely cramped on my lower right side. It was so painful that I laid on the bed crying. Heath called his parents to take arland and off to the hospital we went. I sat on the hospital bed doing a non- stress test making sure the baby was ok. Heath and I waited for a couple of hours before a doctor came in to do and ultrasound. They were optimistic everything was ok. Baby was sounding great, and I was no longer in pain. The doctor left the room and I felt like I peed my pants. My water broke. I yelled to Heath to get the doctor. They tested the fluid and it came back positive for amniotic fluid. I couldn't breathe or speak. They told me that they would be sending me to the university of utah by helicopter. Heath would have to drive. I couldn't think. I felt so alone, and scared. My doctor held my face in his hands and looked at me in the eyes and said "It's going to be ok, you are not alone. And this is not your fault." I cried as the life flight team came in. One of the life flight nurses held my hand and told me that she wouldn't leave me. I felt comforted by her. Like I had known her forever. I felt connected to these people that helped me that took care of me. I wrote more about this day 1 year ago on my blog. I wrote about my fear, my faith in these people and the love I was shown that day. But I will never forget the comfort I felt from my Heavenly Father that day, and every day after that. It is a time in my life I will never forget.